Headaches, Work Hatred, and worries of love

Ah another day, another bout of pain…. I am really wondering why my head is hurting so much lately, but it is really bugging me how much my head hurts at times. I cannot remember ever not having a headache in my life, but lately they have been really bad, I guess it must be stress. Have i mentioned lately how much I absolutely hate my job? Oh… I did, oh well, I’m saying it again anyway, I hate working for Metrotime!

My boss was complaining about absolutely everything today, even though I managed to accomplish not 1 but 3 major tasks today, which considering I’m the entire IT department of that company is a major accomlishment indeed, yet for whatever reason he was complaining about everything today, things weren’t working exactly the way he wanted so I’d fix that, then I’d go back to working on a major task, then he’d be complaining about something else and I’d fix that, and go back to the major task, so between fielding his whining and getting 3 major tasks done, I worked a very hard day for barely any gratitude at all! Oh I hope I can find a better job soon, or I think the stress of this hard work with little pay and no appreciation will end up putting me in a psych ward.

At least I was able to talk to D for a long time tonight, it’s rare that I’m able to get ahold of her and I do enjoy talking to her, so the few times I can talk to her on the phone are always a good way to lift my spirits for the day. Unlike me, she had a good day, however when I called her she said she was waiting for a call from her old boyfriend, so I’m wondering if that means she is getting back together with him, I hope not because I was really hoping to be her new boyfriend. Course I probably shouldn’t write this cause D is just about the only person I know who ever reads this, and I hope that if she does she won’t get mad at me or anything. And if she does… D, I’m so looking forward to visiting you.

Meetings, A/V and my new Laptop

Today was a very long day, I had to get up earlier then normal today to get to the office so that we could ride to Dallas and get there by 11:30 for a meeting with a long time client of Metrotime.Shortly into the beginning of the meeting my cell phone rang, this is actually the first time this has ever happened to me during a business meeting. I was going to ignore it but the client said he needed an excuse to step out of the room for a minute anyway, so I took the call. It was “Mr. E,” the head of the audio/visual team at my church.

He called to ask me if I could be at the church at 6 p.m. tonight to help run powerpoint for the “Team Build” meeting that was going to take place this evening and if I could run the sound board on Saturday for a seminar that was going to take place that he would be unable to run sound for, I said sure on both counts. Momentarily after hanging up the client returned and described the tasks that he needed me to do for him, we left the office and Dallas and took 3 other stops on the way back to Fort Worth, 2 quick office stops and a lunch stop at Taco Bell (yumm, cheesy gordita crunch), before heading back to the office, then I did some work on some cd duplications and some editing of the Metrotime website. I left just after 5 so that I could stop at the bank and get some cash on the way to the church, I arrived at 5:52 exactly and worked the event till 8:30 when I came home.

So that’s pretty much my life today, oh btw, I’m having a blast with my new laptop, it doesn’t run anywhere near as hot as most of the laptops I’ve used in the past, and the battery life is amazing, I was using it at the church for over an hour with the wireless card enabled not plugged in and when I was about to shut it down the battery gage read 5 hours 3 minutes of battery remaining, amazing. Well, gnight for tonight, TTFN!

New Latop, Freeside, and more

And this is my first blog entry typed on my brand new laptop computer, I’ve been waiting for my own laptop for a long time and now I finally have one. As society gets faster and faster, mobility is a necessity in the computing world. Now that I have a laptop I can blog on the go, I may have to start frequenting coffee shops 🙂 or perhaps not.Anyway today was a highly productive day, I fixed most of a freeside installation, made some modifications to allow for more dynamic formatting of the invoices, repaired a computer, repaired an sql installation, and after I came home I started personalizing the new laptop that arrived fedex while I was at work and installing the programs I’ll need to do my job effectively.

Not that much more going on and I have to get up early in the morning because I will have to take a trip out to Dallas to visit a client so I’ll end this log entry for now, talk to ya’ll again soon.

Damp Sheets and late night writing

oh look 5 a.m., I had washed my sheets last night and then I forgot to put them in the dryer so at 3:30 when I realized I wanted to go to bed, I didn’t have any sheets, so I put them in the dryer and then chatted online for a while and then wrote another chapter of my fanfic (Miles Apart), I had meant this chapter 12 to be my last, but I was writing and it ended up longer then any of my prefious chapters and I wasn’t ready to end yet, so I ended it at a logical place and will write a chapter 13, not sure if that will wrap it up either, but it might.

Anyway it’s been a week since I last posted, I’ve had a crummy workweek, a really crummy one.

Monday I went in and my boss was being a complete **** about the webhosting server, first we’re condensing 2 servers to 1 even though he said he’d get the 2nd and did not, then he comes up with this “I want you to turn off the spam and virus filters because I don’t like it that one of my messages got caught by mistake and you had access to get it back” and I was like “would you rather the message gotten lost forever?” but is all up on some privacy kick so I removed the virus and spam filters, but because of the way they were set up it was all or nothing, I couldn’t just remove it from his account, I had to remove it from ALL accounts so now I get a rediculous amount of spam. Then he’s also had this box he’s wanted me to work on that I always had a hunch was going to be a lot of work for no pay and he had wanted me to just get paid from what he charges the client, I ended up working on that box ALL WEEK LONG and still to no avail, the box is still not ready, it’s driving me nuts!

It has been the work week from hell, and yet my online friends are telling me I need to work more hours, I can’t stand working too many hours with him, he questions every single hour I put on my timecard, he gives me rediculous tasks, and he thinks he’s doing me a favor in all of it! I can’t stand it anymore.

What’s worse is this is my only avenue to vent this stuff and I have this fear that he is going to see this blog oneday and get pissed at me and I’ll have burned a bridge without wanting to.

Anyway it’s been the whole week from hell except for Wednesday and Friday, Wednesday work was murder but when I got home me and Dad went online (after watching an Enterprise double feature which I enjoyed cause it was like the first time I’ve sat down and watched an episode of trek with him where he seemed to be enjoying it) and specced out my new laptop computer at dell.com and ordered it so it should be coming next week, of course after doing all that I picked up the newspaper on Thursday and there was an announcement “Effective today, Dell is dropping their prices on most of their merchandise!” which included their line of laptops but that’s ok, I’m still getting a nice laptop at a decent price and I’ll be able to work more efficiently, instead of waiting till the middle of the night to use my dad’s computer like I am now.

Today (Friday, not the 5 hours between midnight and now) was fun, I went to Frys to purchase some parts to upgrade a server for my friend JMac, and then my entire family went to Medieval Times to celebrate my little brother’s 18th birthday which was today.

Medieval Times was a blast, David was “knighted” and got a souvanier photo, the meal was great (and where else can you pay high prices and then eat messily with your hands on dented metal plates), and the entertainment was an absolute blast. We were in the front row of the Yellow section and had an excellent view of the stadium. I highly recommend you go to one of these places if you ever get the opportunity, it is an absolute blast

So I may write more later but now I’m exhausted as it is now 5:30 a.m. and I’ve been up all night, so good night all.

Birthday Shopping and Play watching

::in best news voice:: And this is Nick Moline with the weekend report ::end news voice::

Yesterday was interesting, mom threw a Jewlery party at the house so I sought the first excuse I could to get out of there, and that excuse ended up being helping my dad (who was also trying to escape the women buying jewlery) pick out my little brother’s birthday present (his birthday is this coming Friday), on the off chance that he reads this or that one of his friends reads this and passes it on to him, I won’t say anything further about gift shopping.

So I took a seperate car then my dad so we took a slightly longer then normal time shopping for the gift then Dad went back to the party and I snuck off to the movies. On the risk of embarassing myself I will tell you what movie I went and saw, Freaky Friday. Newsflash all, it’s good, no really it is!

Yes it’s a 3rd version of the same movie by the same movie studio (for those of you who don’t know, there was a made for TV movie version of Freaky Friday back in ’95 in addition to the 70’s original with Jodie Foster). I have to say this latest version with Jamie Lee Curtis and Lindsay Lohen is very good, perhaps better then the original.

Lindsay is very convincing as both the Teen and the adult in the teen body, Jamie is also convincing in both her roles and plays a hillarious teen trapped in a woman’s body, however although it is a convincing teen, it’s not very convincing that it is Anna (Lindsay’s character at the beginning of the movie) trapped in Tess’s body rather then some other teen, Lindsay is a bit more mellow in general then the “child version” of Curtis, but it was still hillarious, the only problem with the movie is I think they went over the top in Anna’s love interest in the movie falling for Anna stuck in Tess’s body, yes I know the point was to show that he liked Anna for her mind not her body, but yuck, it went a bit too far when he was singing “Hit Me Baby One More Time” outside Tess’ window, talk about freaky.

Anyway after the party one of mom’s friends was still hanging around the house for several hours, but one is managable, 10 is not.

On to today…

I got up early to go to church, Mr. E the head of the audio visual team had told me earlier that I would be put in a rotational schedule and not be needed every week but he hadn’t yet told me what that schedule was so I decided to come anyway just in case it was my week, turns out it was not, next week is. So I still went to both services anyway, was actually kinda cool, in the first service I was asked to help collect the offering for the first time in the 4 and a half years I’ve gone to this church. In the 2nd service I sat with my family for the first time in a long time, well most of my family, David sat with the youth group, but it was nice to sit with my parents for once.

After church and a brief lunch the four of us went to see a play at Theater Arlington, that was fun, it is the second time I’ve been there, the first time was for a presentation of It’s a Wonderful Life back in December, today’s presentation was called Communicating Doors and dealt with time travel, it was quite good, I won’t discuss the plot here cause it would take too long, but I found it quite interesting and entertaining, a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon.

Overall it was a nice weekend, but in the morning it is back to the grindstone, how fun! TTFN!

Loss of a laptop and a book

Well today I had to send back the company laptop to North Carolina, over $70 it cost to ship that thing, yowza!

So now I have no computer of my own to use anymore, someone online suggested I check out rent-a-center so I’ve submitted an info request to them, my Dad said I should check out Dell’s financing options on getting a laptop so I’ve done some looking there as well, so hopefully I will have a laptop again soon so that I can continue to work.

Worked on trying to get the billing system working on the new server today, had a few snags but I should be able to iron them out quickly enough, just not right now, right now I’m going home, I’m tired and I haven’t eaten anything ALL DAY!

Other then that, not much is happening, except for the fact that I just realized that the .doc file of my new book I’m writing (Another Time) was on that laptop that I just shipped away DOH!!!!! I forgot to take the file off, how stupid of me! Aww man! Oh well, I guess I’ll have to start over at the beginning, darn and I was 2 chapters into the book already too.

Well I’ll update again tomorrow I think, ttfn!

Birthday updates

On the highly unlikely chance that someone is actually reading my blog…. you may have wondered if I dropped off the face of the earth or something, no I did not, in actuality I moved back in with my family in TX, got settled in, and then… took a vacation! Actually my 21st birthday was this past Sunday and my mom and I have been planning to visit Vegas for my 21st birthday for the past 2 years.

I should have known I wouldn’t have any luck whatsoever when we got to the first hotel room on Friday night (we stayed at a different location each night as we were bargain bouncing). The first night we stayed at the most shabby of the 3 locations, Motel 6. After a rediculous amount of difficulty finding our room, we found out that our key did not work, so we found our way back to the lobby where they told us that they sent us to the wrong room, so another room hunt later and we had found the new room, well I was carrying my bags upstairs and I was wearing new dress shoes (a requirement for the type of tickets we fly on) that I wasn’t used to wearing yet, well the walkway on the 2nd floor was uneven and I quickly found myself tripping over my feet and then sprawled out in pain with a badly twisted ancle. I should have known then that I wouldn’t have any luck all weekend 😛

Despite the fact that I was still in great pain, Saturday was very nice. We started out by having brunch at the MGM Grand, and while the brunch was overpriced and bland, it wasn’t bad, afterwards we took a look at the Lion habitat, mom was fascinated by the “big kitties” as she called them, well I wasn’t 21 yet so it would have been a state felony for me to loiter around while mom played the slots so instead we went and found the hotel that we would be staying in that night, the French Quarter Suites so that we could check in and unload our bags rather then carry them around the rest of the day. Unfortunately there had been some mix up in the reservation and the room did not have 2 beds like it was supposed to, so I had the joy of sleeping on a rollaway bed that night, but I am jumping ahead.

After checking in we found our way to the Trek fan’s paradise, Star Trek: The Experience in the Las Vegas Hilton. Those of you who know my website may know that I have been there before, so rather then describe the ride here, I’ll just point you to my previous explanation of the ride and then explain what has changed. What has changed? Well first of all the lines are much shorter now so you can ride it more times in less time for one thing, but the bigger change is that they have an addon now where for $14.99 extra you can go onto the Bridge of the Enterprise D alone (with full lightning as opposed to the red alert lighting you see during the ride), sit in the captain’s chair, and have your picture taken, then get that picture as a souvanier. As soon as I can arrange to have that picture scanned I’ll put it up here. But while I hate the way I look in this photograph, it was worth it just to sit in the captain’s chair and walk around the bridge for a few minutes. I had an awesome time.

I stayed at the experience for a few hours, browsed the shops and rode the ride a couple times before me and Mom headed to buy a few items at the store and then go to dinner. I needed to pick up a network cable so that I could plug in the laptop at the hotel and we picked up some sodas and some other items to consume later that evening and then we went to the best meal in vegas, In-n-out burger, no really I’m serious. I used to love those places back when I lived in Southern California, they have absolutely the best french fries in the universe, and great burgers too. Kinda odd that we would spend $15 each to have brunch and not like it, and then spend less then $5 each for dinner and love it, but we did.

Back at the hotel we played some cards and watched some television, mom was tired so she went to bed but she told me to wake her up at midnight so we can celebrate my birthday. I attempted to hook up the laptop but found out that the data tap in my room was broken, so I couldn’t get on the internet and… update this blog!

I let mom sleep till about 1 a.m. and then woke her up as she requested, she brought out the items she had selected for me to “try,” a bottle of champagne, a small bottle of merlot, and a small bottle of white-zymphendale, I didn’t care for any of the 3 of them unfortunately, how can anyone drink this stuff? We finished our ongoing game of rummy and then went to bed, where I slept on the rollaway bed I mentioned previously (now not only was my ankle hurting but I had a stiff back too, oh well)

Sunday morning we decided to try a brunch at the casino that was across the street from the French Quarter Suites, The Orleans Hotel and Casino. This brunch was a few dollars cheaper then the one at the MGM on Saturday but despite this, it was a much much better brunch. This place has everything, if you are vacationing in Vegas and want a good meal, go there, trust me! I had mongolian bar-b-q, seafood, pasta (I am not a breakfast person so I was going for the lunch items on the menu, it was 11:30 after all) and all sorts of other delicious treats, both mom and me topped it off with a do it yourself strawberry shortcake from their desert bar, fabulous!

After breakfast mom and me decided to see a movie in the movie theater inside that casino, well this is the second time that day that that particular casino impressed me, the movie theater was full sized, they had like 18 screens. We saw Tomb Raider 2 and both enjoyed it, I found it better then the first Tomb Raider movie as it displayed her as closer to her game character, solving puzzles and the like. Go see it if you like action flicks.

Anyway afterwords mom and I went to the Luxor and took a look around, Mom had always wanted to check out the inside of that place, it was pretty cool, I love researching ancient history so seeing a place done up in an ancient egypt theme was very cool, though personally I preferred the next place we visited, we took the moving sidewalks across the street to the Excaliber, I love the midevil period, so the castle theme was more fun to me then the egyptian theme, we caught 2 shows at a small stage, a juggling act and a magic act that was quite fun, and then I got a picture of me in the stocks (although I have picutres of most of these locations I’ll just give a link to them at the end of this blog entry) which I know some of you, especially D, would love to see me clapped in irons so here it is.

Sorry that the lighting isn’t better but my camera was really acting up this weekend. Anyway making our way back through the skywalks and through the Luxor and out to the rental car, we were then tired enough to go check into the 3rd and final hotel for the night, the Stardust. We tried to check in via the automated check in but it wouldn’t work so we waited in line for the check in counter where we were given our room keys and instructions to go up to the 20th floor (man was I ever glad the elevators were working whew). When we got to our room we found that housekeeping had neglected to clean that room so I called the front desk and let them know, then mom and I went down to use our $5 off vouchers for a meal at their buffet. The buffet wasn’t bad but I didn’t have anything actually off of the buffet anyway, we both had steak and lobster tail and then some sides from the buffet, it was pretty good.

All throughout this day I had played a few slot machines at each casino we stopped at, the only place I had any luck was the Orleans where I left that place with more then I got there with, every place else sucked me dry but no place drained me as fast as the Stardust did, both me and mom lost everything we had brough to gamble with but both of us had been responsible enough to only bring a set amount to gamble with and we were not going to go spend more then that.

914So Monday after packing up early, we had nothing left to spend on the slots so we went to have one last… BURGER AT IN-N-OUT BURGER!!!! yumyumyum!!!!!! before returning the rental car, heading to the airport, and waiting 4 and a half hours for our return flight home. So that’s how I spent my 21st birthday, to see the rest of the pics I took in my camera, click the image on the left.

Today was tiring, I spent the day moving things from an old server to a new server it was time consuming and it gave me a headache, especially when there was a routing issue in the new server and I couldn’t get it online correctly, but the subspacelink is on a new box now, as well as the sites of all of metrotime’s customers. That’s all for now, I’ll post again soon.

No brotherly visit

What I meant to mention in my earlier post but neglected to say because I started ranting is that the latest thing to bug me in my life is the fact that I had been very much looking forward to my brother visiting me today from TX, but his flight was cancelled and he couldn’t come. The flights aren’t looking very good for tomorrow either so I am not sure if he will make it tomorrow either.

Continue reading No brotherly visit

Desperation of having to go back to TX

Well my depression that has been setting in deeper and deeper for months now hit a new low this morning at about 3 a.m. The final confirmation that we are closing down the office came from the boss. I’m jobless and am going to have to move back in with my family. Furthermore I’m going to end up going into debt to my old boss to be able to afford to do this. I really don’t want to work for him on a long term basis again but I’m feeling as if I may have no choice.

I sent my resume to one company yesterday, got the response back that they have no openings available but will keep me in mind when openings do come up. I’m going to send it off to another company today, anything to avoid working for Metrotime again. I can handle working for Metrotime for a few weeks or even a month or two, but I don’t want to get myself locked into it, I was not treated properly there and the sad thing is my boss didn’t even realize how poorly he was treating me. He seemed to think he was doing me a favor and that he was incredibly kind to me. He does have a kind atitude most of the time, but it’s not all about atitude, it’s about respect. I didn’t get it there. I was asked to do rediculous tasks and I was never even offered an actual position, I was a consultant the entire 2 years I worked for him, which of course meant double taxes (self employment tax). He would continually say “I’m going to put you on regular insert time here“, but each time he would say that, the time would come, and the time would go, and then weeks later he would say again, “I’m going to put you on regular insert another time here.”

It’s not only that, I gave him my business outright and asked for only 2 things in return. I asked that #1) he pay me for my time when I had to work on the server, and #2) That he honor the agreements I had made with several of my customers. Well there were several instances where he would order me to continually work on the server until the task was completed and then when it came time to pay, would not pay me for anything after say 6 p.m. when I worked all night and into the next day to fix the problem that he would order me to do. I did not appreciate that one bit, but I kept my mouth shut. As for my customers, he would continually say things like “How come this person is only paying this much?” and I would answer “Cause that’s what we agreed upon” and he would say “Well he should be paying this much, I’m going to send him a letter.” That really pissed me off, I asked for only 2 things when I gave him my business with my customers and he wouldn’t keep to either one of them.

He didn’t even realize he was doing it, it drove me crazy, how could he not see what he was doing to me, how could he not see how much he hurt me all the time? And now he seems like my only hope for being able to afford to move my stuff back home. Talk about your tripple whamy.

  1. The one thing I have always wanted was to be independant, to be able to provide for myself, now after living that dream for only 6 months I have to move back home with my parents.
  2. The only way I can afford to do so is to get my old boss that I hated working for to front me the money necessary to rent the uHaul and pay for gas, lodging, and food for the trip home, thus putting me in his debt and requiring me to work for him again.
  3. On top of all this, I cannot help but feel the shame as if I am a complete failure for this project not working

Yeah I know the last one really doesn’t make sense, especially for those of you that know my situation. The problems of Western Carolina Wireless are not at all my fault, and I worked incredibly hard to circumvent those problems to no avail. But I’m a profectionist, when a project I’m working on fails, I cannot help but feel shame at failure. I hate defeat. I loathe it, but here it is, staring right at me. What am I to do?

One thing is certain, I have GOT to find a job with medical benefits so that I can see a doctor about what I believe to be clinical depression.

Crack out the Resumes

Well the continuing saga of if Western Carolina Wireless is going to continue operating goes on and on. Depression seemed to be at one of its highest points ever at the office today. In fact both of my coworkers left considerably early, and before 3 p.m. I was the only one at the office, and I stayed there till about 6 all alone.

Continue reading Crack out the Resumes